He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize
