babies were throwing up all over the place
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Randomize