I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
