So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
