I have demons in me.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
