"it" just moved
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
