it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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