I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Randomize
