i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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