I'm going to jail i love you
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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