...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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