i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
