I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
