Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
