69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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