I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
