great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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