Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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