I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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