we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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