My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
