Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
These tits shall not be calmed
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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