I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
