last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Randomize
