My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Randomize
