dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
