How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
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