But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
