yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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