just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
Randomize
