the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
