I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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