would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
