I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
