it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
