The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize
