there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
