I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize