I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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