I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
