u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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