Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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