Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize