he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize