plz talk dirty to me
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize