"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize