Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
