Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Duck Duck Cougar?
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
