covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
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