mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
