I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
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