Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Mom said you looked used
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
